Navigating Adulthood Without a Roadmap 📍
+ what i'm loving lately, sephora sale picks and this week's recipe roundup!
if you enjoy listening more than reading, cool! i recorded a voiceover of the below piece i wrote. grab a cup of coffee, take a seat/go on a short walk, and have a listen!
turning 30 was fun. it was all about embracing the ~vibe~ of ‘being in my thirties’. everywhere I turned, I was met with cheers and encouragement to savor the essence of "being 30." but hitting 31? a whole new ball game. suddenly, it feels like because I'm now 31, I should have my life diligently figured out. as if it's my duty to revel in this new decade while simultaneously gearing up for the challenges of "real life" waiting around the corner.
"so, what's next?" — a question that has been haunting me for months now. it's a slippery slope for a self-proclaimed control freak like me. people start probing about your future plans, and you find yourself spiraling into a whirlwind of thoughts. you think, “wait, should i have it all mapped out by now?” and the next thing you know, you're knee-deep in setting up Zillow alerts for dream homes in areas your bank account does not agree with. cue the unwelcome thoughts: have I hit the fifth year of my meticulously crafted five-year plan? where do I go from here? am I expected to suddenly grasp the intricacies of the stock market? am I... gasp... unprepared?
when folks ask me about my next move, I respond with brutal honesty: "I don't know." but being me, I don't just leave it at that like a normal, sane person would. no, I go on to paint a vivid picture: "well, ideally, I'd love to inhabit an early 19th-century farmhouse tucked away in upstate New York. picture it: tranquility every day, yet just a train ride away from the hustle and bustle of the city. then again, there's the allure of the Bay Area—nature's playground with near-perfect weather and a burgeoning community. and let's not forget about LA, where my parents live, eagerly awaiting the joys of grandparenthood, aka 4 a.m. diaper duty. buuuuut reality check, we're more in the renting realm, which sadly puts our dreams of adopting a dog on hold. i dream of a garden where I can cultivate my own sustenance, maybe even raise a couple of chickens. oh, and there's this tiny part of us that fantasizes about packing our bags and relocating to Europe, perhaps the Netherlands. sorry, Mom and Dad!" i am met with both wide eyes and dropped jaws — this is one way to really shut somebody up.
both online and offline, I'm bombarded with friends and colleagues making what they call "adult decisions." sometimes, it makes me question if I'm adulting hard enough. would getting engaged do the trick? how about diving into homeownership? writing a book? renovating our kitchen? but amidst the noise, in those moments of clarity, I find solace in knowing that I'm exactly where I need and want to be. yet, it's the 21st century, the era of endless information at our fingertips, and being human means inevitably second-guessing every move we make (or don't make).
i've always been a late bloomer. junior college before a four-year institution, first serious relationship at 22, and my inaugural savings account established just a few years ago in 2021. call it a defense mechanism, but being a late bloomer has somehow always panned out for me. here's what I've come to realize: It's ridiculously easy to compare our lives, decisions, and progress to those around us. easy to feel like we're lagging behind, coveting what others have, craving control over the next 2, 5, or 10 years. but here's the kicker: change is the only constant in life. our circumstances are in a perpetual state of flux and evolution. TL;DR: screw your meticulously outlined five-year plan. we're constantly teetering on the brink of uncertainty, and the sooner we embrace that reality, the smoother the ride becomes.
I'm not ready to chart out my "next steps" because right now, the only steps I'm concerned with are what's for breakfast tomorrow and maybe our weekend plans. beyond that? undiscovered territory, my friend. and that's okay—because i believe that embracing the uncharted waters of life can unveil joys beyond our wildest imagination.
“It's not a terrible thing that we feel fear when faced with the unknown. It is part of being alive, something we all share.” - Pema Chodron
i think all of us, in our own unique ways, are grappling with the fear of not knowing what lies ahead. it's both terrifying and exhilarating because it means our lives have the potential to unfold in a million different ways. when we release the grip on trying to control every decision, or impressing others with decisions we may never even make, we realize that we're all just trying to navigate life and all of its craziness, one day at a time.
i wanted to take a moment to say HELLO! to new subscribers — last week, i was elated to find that ‘On The Rocks’ was chosen as a featured publication on Substack’s Discover tab. if you’re new here, please don’t be shy! comment on this post & introduce yourself! that goes for all subscribers, would love to hear from you and THANK YOU for being here!
loving lately
i’ve always been a fan of hydration powders. they’re like an adult comfort drink. but lmnt takes the fuckin cake. BURY ME IN LMNT. the flavor is perfect & it truly does make me feel more hydrated throughout the day. it’s an amazing recovery drink for those of you who are active. use 1/2 pack with 32oz ice water.
how many of you are slipper people? it feels like a tight knit crew and until a few months ago, i wasn’t about that life but something within me changed and now i literally do not move a single limb in the house unless my slippers are on. i have two pairs of ugg slippers: these are inside only slippers and these are incase i need to run outside and move the car frantically on street sweeping days.
i’ve always been a fan of away luggage. i’ve had this carry-on for 6 years and it’s still good as new. the price tag is shocking but imo, worth the investment. i just got their travel backpack which fits everything beautifully AND has a trolley sleeve to fit onto my suticase. ocd = healed.
honorable mention: the Emile Cardigan that literally everyone asks me about is FINALLY back in stock!!! i wear an XL for an oversized look. RUN to Sezane!
sephora sale picks
the sephora sale starts TODAY !! it’s time for girl math, folks. below are a few of my favorite products i use almost daily 💸
the dyson airwrap is worth every penny and then some. i was hesitant when i bought it, but i’ve had it for 3 years and it still does an unreal job. the one downside is now everyone wants me to do their hair before weddings, lol.
frizzy hair queens: the crown affair hair towel is the ONLY way i will dry my hair. plus, i stan every other product crown affair carries.
this is a new, fragrance free version of my favorite farmacy makeup remover!
this air dry cream is step one in my two-part natural haircare routine.
ouai wave spray is step two. spray it everywhere, but not too much. trial and error.
i tried gisou hair oil for the first time a couple of weeks ago and i love it. it defrizzed me in .4 seconds and it doesn’t make my hair feel greasy!
this ceremonia scalp scrubber is the one product i’ll be buying during the sale. so excited, i’ve been wanting a scalp scrubber! lol…
are we still using anastasia brow freeze? i really show my millennial when i catch onto a tiktok trend a year late but this shit makes me snaaatched. i love it.
it’s no secret i’m obsessed with all things merit - i use every single product they make and that is not a joke. i love their mascara in particular because it doesn’t make my eyes water (i’m sensitive, okay?)
*this post contains some affiliate links, so i have the chance to make a small commission at no extra cost to you
brain bites 🧠🍴
a new section of the newsletter! nourishing your intellect and feeding your guilty pleasures by sharing what i’m reading, listening to, watching, and learning about in the media.
in the future, this will be a feature exclusively for paid subscribers. upgrade your membership if you’re picking up what i’m putting down.
Read This: i just finished the book Three Women and woah. 4/5 stars. it’s non-fiction but reads like fiction (which i love) and explores the messiness and beauty that comes with being a woman.
Loewve vs. Ssense: last week i watched children spelling designer brand names, and this week i watched Dan Levy and Aubrey Plaza doing… kind of the same thing? people were heated in Loewe’s ig comments saying they stole the idea from Ssense, but anyone who knows anything about advertising knows both campaigns have likely been in the works for months and it was just a very unfortunate (and odd?) coincidence. but also, i had no idea how to pronounce Loewe (loo-ev-ay) so it did its job. did you watch either ad campaign? did you find one catchier than the other? i’ll let you guess which one i liked more…
i want to try the Loewe Tomato Candle but… it’s $250. if we have any readers with a hookup, lmk and i’ll give an in depth review.
i’m really enjoying the new Beyoncé album. i’m actually a big classic country fan - this is something that very few people know about me (not modern country! think: Glen Campbell, Ronnie Milsap, Linda Martell, Ray Price.. OG heartbreak music), so Bey’s take on twang tunes is welcomed. if you’re confused about the genre shift, read this article about how country music was created by Black folks and how Beyoncé is reclaiming the genre for Black America.
recipe roundup
Easter Dinner
i made
’s 12 hour lamb + chickpeas for Easter dinner and it was a hit. there are very few things that bring me more joy than a low maintenance recipe that cooks while you sleep. culinary jackpot.
Espresso Frizzante
the drink of Spring, with a twist. espresso is combined with oj, sparkling water and a homemade vanilla, honey & bay leaf syrup that will earn its permanent place in your fridge for all coffee drinks in the future.
Herby Snap Pea Chopped Salad
i will forever continue my quest to make lunch interesting because lunch can sometimes be SO boring and we need more excitement in our lives. this salad is so tasty & filling, plus you can get all of the ingredients at TJ’s if that’s your thing!
6-Ingredient Cuban Sandwiches
one of my favorite parts about being Cuban is making recipes that would cause my Abuela to roll in her graaaave. this is the laziest version of a Cuban sandwich, made the Noceda way, with Pik Niks with an easy mojo dipping sauce. it’s almost like a Cuban grilled cheese. i made mine with rolls because 9 mini sandwiches is sometimes better than 2 large ones.
What’s Next
On The Record — i’m planning my interview series which will be available in its entirety to paid subscribers. i want guests to come from a wide range of disciplines, not just influencers you see on instagram. if you are interested in hearing from anyone in particular, please write to me anonymously with a name (or multiple!) and i’ll work on including them. dream big - no one is off limits!
Guided Meditation — i woke up last Monday morning incredibly anxious so i meditated. it reminded me that even 6 minutes of grounding down and coming back to your breath can change your entire day. if you’re an og, you remember i “morning breath with Olivia” on instagram live during the pandemic - i miss those! so, i plan to release a 5-10 minute guided meditation/breath work situation in next week’s newsletter for paid subscribers.
Incase You Missed It
i released my Copenhagen Travel Guide last week and received the kindest responses about how much you all loved it. i hope you use it in its entirety!
read about how i’m Escaping the Scroll - aka how i stopped using social media entirely on the weekends. it’s been 3 weeks - life changing might be a strong word to use - but i feel so alive and present.
as always, thank you for being here. writing this newsletter has brought me so much joy and a newfound sense of purpose. sending love! x Liv
I feel like I'm hearing more and more from people who're in their late bloomer/starting over era. It's always so validating to get this reminder that we're all just trying to figure things out.
olivia- this piece really hit home and as a late bloomer myself in my mid 30s i can totally relate to everything you've shared. very inspired by your piece and love that you shared so vulnerably. ty!