What I'm Making This Week

date coffee creamer, farro & chickpea salad, brothy pinto beans (+ my current meltdown and our fave Sea Ranch Spots!)

it was my birthday this past weekend, and i spent it in Sea Ranch with my little family. everything felt blissful. the kind of effortless, slow joy that makes you think, wow, 32 is going to be my year.

but beneath the haze of morning hikes under the redwoods, my brain was working overtime. deadlines loomed (literally this newsletter), my future felt like an ever-growing to-do list (second egg freezing consult this week !!!), and i was juggling the ongoing stress of literally just keeping my dog alive while also deciding that now is the moment to redesign my bedroom. because why not add one more thing to my already overflowing plate? what started as a creative outlet has quickly become yet another way to channel my ocd tendencies into something i can control! fun!

sea ranch, on film

but everything was still manageable, still humming under the surface, until Saturday, when we took Frankie to the vet. she was so anxious that they couldn’t examine her ear infection. they sent us home with trazodone and told us to try again Monday. later that night when i got home from a party, she had somehow escaped her crate and peed all over our bed.

32 years old! this is my year, baby! knee-deep in nature’s miracle spray at midnight, sobbing as i try to airwap dry the wet spots! oh yeah! one second i was frustrated and sad for her, and the next, i was in full spiral mode. my life is a mess. i haven’t gotten any real work done in weeks. i’m failing at everything. the house is never clean. i hate my clothes, i hate my room, my dog is going to be anxious forever, i’m going to be anxious forever, etc., etc.

MY ANGEL!!! she is brave, she’s well behaved, she is not afraid!!!!

this always happens around my birthday. the gotcha moment. just when i start to believe i have everything together life humbles me right back down. and i’m still in it. still standing in the tornado of emotions, ping-ponging between deep gratitude and existential dread every other hour.

so i’m trying to be soft with myself. to remember that things are only as hard as i make them. that some things can wait. that it’s okay if i don’t get to everything. but like, i really need to freeze my eggs, so i’m just going to add another layer of hormones to my plate sometime soon and pray i don’t barrel towards total insanity.

the antidote to the absolute saga above? the three recipes below. they’re easy, preppable, nourishing meals designed for the weeks when you feel like you just can’t. because even when life is a mess, we still have to eat.

oh, and don’t forget to scroll all the way down for my sea ranch itinerary—because if nothing else, at least one part of my life is organized (jk my friend Anna pretty much planned the entire weekend for me and i’m indebted to her forever and grateful she’s letting me share it with you all!)

What I’m Making This Week

as always, i’ve left one of the recipes free for all subscribers, while the other two live behind the paywall. if you’re a paid subscriber, thank you for directly supporting what i do—you allow me to keep creating. if you’re not, i still appreciate you being here more than you know and love you just the same xx

chopped farro salad, date coffee creamer, spicy brothy beans

Homemade Date Coffee Creamer

ingredients

• 6 medjool dates, pitted

• ½ cup boiling water (for soaking)

• 1 tbsp olive oil

• ¼ tsp sea salt

• ½ tsp ground cardamom

• 1 tsp vanilla extract

• ½ cup half & half

• ¼ cup reserved date water (adjust for consistency)

method

• place pitted dates in a heatproof bowl and cover with boiling water. let them soak for about 10 minutes until softened.

• in a tall jar or container, add the soaked dates, olive oil, sea salt, cardamom, vanilla, half & half, and ¼ cup of the date water.

• use an immersion blender (or high-speed blender) to blend until completely smooth. if it’s too thick, add more date water a little at a time until it reaches your desired consistency.

• pour into an airtight jar or bottle and keep in the fridge for up to a week.

• add to hot or iced coffee as needed and shake before drinking!

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incase you feel like reading the recipe on its own:

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Sea Ranch, California — an itinerary

Sea Ranch is one of my top five favorite places on earth—a place that feels almost untouched, like a secret carved into the California coastline. it’s the kind of beauty that makes you slow down without even trying. this is my second time visiting, and each time has felt like a reset. a place where time moves differently, where the biggest decision of the day is whether to take a walk before or after coffee.

this trip had no packed itinerary— there was no pressure to do anything other than exist. my plan was to not have too much of a plan.

if you’re looking for the ultimate weekend escape, this is it. and if you do want a little structure, i’ve written an itinerary below for the best food and best beaches/places to walk around.

this guide was originally made by my friend, Anna, who gave me permission to share it with you all. i added asterisks to the places i personally went and can vouch for!

but just know: the best plan there is sometimes no plan at all.

stay

this is where we stayed during our trip, and i couldn’t recommend it more! we absolutely loved hot tubbing under the stars, making fires (i did not make any fires i happily gave that job to Thom), and drinking coffee under the redwoods. you have access to 50+ private hiking trails, too!

what i will say is that if you’re looking for a big and bright house, this probably isn’t the best choice. it’s much moodier because it’s nestled in the redwoods but it gets beautiful slices of sunlight throughout the day. also, it’s only about a 4min drive from Sea Ranch Lodge and you can easily use the house as an origin point for an ocean view hike.

food

• Surf Market—the best groceries and outdoor bbq stand on fridays and saturday’s. you mustttt get the buffalo mac n cheese.*